Scandal
by 2Padfoot00Moony7
Summary: Sirius sighed dreamily, “I think I’m in love…” ...Sirius falls for a girl... But where does Remus fit in with this? RLSB


****

Scandal

Remus sighed as the door shut and the girl left, detention calling her.

He groaned and leant his head against the wall behind him. Normally he'd have no problem with taking a pretty girl into a closet for a couple of hours, this time though, this time he'd gone too far.

For the girl he'd taken into the closet had been none other than Sirius Black's latest girlfriend.

He sighed again, eyes closing. He didn't know why he'd done it…

Maybe, maybe it was to do with the intense jealousy he felt…

Maybe, maybe it was to do with the unbearable anger he felt…

Maybe, maybe…

He reopened his eyes and stepped out of the closet, hurriedly straightening out his shirt and all but running back to the common room, desperate to escape his thoughts.

"Hey," Sirius caught hold of Remus just as he was about to run smack bang into him, "Where are you going in such rush?"

"N-nowhere," Remus stammered, blushing madly and avoiding Sirius' eyes.

Sirius arched an eyebrow, his nose twitching, "Why I smell perfume, is there something you need to tell me Mr Lupin?"

Trying to ignore the way his heart was speeding up and telling himself Sirius knew nothing, he shook his head quickly. Almost _too _quickly.

Leaving his arm around Remus' shoulders, Sirius steered the werewolf back to the common room. "Haven't seen Clarissa have you?" he asked at one point.

Remus looked at him blankly, "Who?"

"My girlfriend. I was looking for her."

__

The girl you just spent two hours in a tiny, cramped cupboard with…

The nasty little voice in Remus' head supplied, _Getting as bad as Sirius you are; you don't even know her name! _

"Sorry Padfoot, haven't seen her," Remus lied smoothly. He knew that right now he should be ashamed, he should be on his knees begging Sirius for mercy, he should be stammering out apologies… He should be feeling even the slightest bit if guilt.

But he didn't.

He didn't feel _anything _except the urge to do it again.

Sirius gave him a funny look, "But I saw you two leaving the common room together?"

Remus paused, his mind ticking furiously looking for an excuse whilst the sane part of him scolded him for lying, "Yeah… I went to the library - she went loo or something I think."

"… The library is at the opposite end of the school Remus…"

__

See? You can't even lie properly! For a smart person you're extremely stupid,

the nasty little voice was back.

"…er - yeah, I know that. I was er- taking the scenic route back…"

Sirius didn't question him further.

****

.x0x.

James Potter was sat staring at the fire and thinking about Lily Evans when his partner in crime appeared at his side, dumping a dazed looking Remus opposite them.

"I think Moony has finally got himself some girl," Sirius whispered in James' ear.

James glanced at said werewolf, "I think you might just be right about that."

Sirius smirked, "Of course. Sirius Black is always right my dear."

Remus lifted his head and frowned at him, "I haven't got myself a girl thank-you very much."

"Well you're getting laid at least! He's got that sort of… glow." Sirius insisted whilst James nodded along with him.

"I have been laid before you know and I'd appreciate it if you'd keep your nose out of my business!" Remus folded his arms angrily as Sirius' girlfriend sauntered over, telling Sirius that her teacher had let her off detention.

"Did you seduce them?" Sirius asked playfully whilst Remus scowled at the pair of them.

Clarissa giggled, throwing Remus the merest half-glance, "My detention was with Professor McGonagall…"

"Ooh! Kinky!"

Growling, Remus stomped to his feet, mumbled good night and stormed upstairs.

He still didn't feel guilty.

****

.x0x.

And that was how it began.

That was how he found himself frequently in closets with Sirius' latest conquests.

And he still couldn't bring himself to feel guilty.

Nor did it dowse the bitter flame of jealousy that lurked at the bottom of his stomach.

****

.x0x.

"Are you sure you haven't got some girl Moons?"

"Fuck off Padfoot."

"Grumpy!"

"Well I'd appreciate it if you'd leave me alone and let me read for godsake!"

"And if I don't want to?"

"… I shall curse you."

"Curse me then…"

"What the bloody hell are you two doing?" James eyed them curiously as he stepped into the dorm, "You look like you're about to kiss or something."

Remus rolled his eyes and pushed Sirius away from where they had been nose to nose.

"Moony won't tell me about his girl!" Sirius pouted.

"Good on him," Lily said calmly as she stepped after James, "If he doesn't want to tell you; don't force him."

****

.x0x.

It was two girls later that somebody finally walked in on them.

"Oh my god! Remus!" Lily squeaked as she quickly slammed the door shut again. When Remus and Elizabeth finally emerged five minutes later, Lily quickly pushed him back inside with a cool glare at Elizabeth.

Remus smiled uncertainly at her, not missing the angry stance, "… sorry?"

"What the hell were you doing with her?! She's Sirius' girlfriend for crying out loud! She's off limits to you!" Lily shrieked angrily, not exactly knowing why she was defending Black.

"I know she's his girlfriend! And it's not like he won't have a different one in a few days anyway," said Remus bitterly.

Lily rose an eyebrow, "Don't you feel even the slightest bit guilty?"

Remus slid down the wall, his head in his hands, "Does that make me an awful person?"

Lily shook her head, sighing and sliding down opposite him, her anger evaporating at Remus' expression, "Just a stupid person. Want to talk about it?"

So Remus found himself explaining everything, from the bitter jealousy to the angry outbursts.

When he'd finished his heartfelt tale, Lily patted him consolingly on the arm, "Poor poor Remus, poor poor _naïve _Remus."

When he demanded that she told him was she was going on about, she laughed and told him that he'd have to figure it out for himself.

"What the hell were you two doing in there?" James shouted as he passed by at the very moment they were stepping out of the closet.

"Talking," Lily replied, her eyes twinkling, "If you'd like to do something more strenuous then do step back in." James grinned and quickly headed inside leaving Remus to dawdle back to Gryffindor with the first seeds of doubt in his mind.

****

.x0x.

"Moony… Moony wake up…" Sirius prodded him in the side.

"'ugger ff 'ads." Remus mumbled sleepily, swatting at where he thought Sirius was.

"No. Wake up you great lump." With a huge tug, Sirius pulled the duvet off Remus, successfully waking the irritated werewolf.

"What the hell can be so important that you had to wake me up at-" (he checked his watch) "- four in the flipping morning?" Remus asked grumpily, his voice slightly slurred.

Sirius sighed dreamily, "I think I'm in love…"

Trying to ignore the painful clench of his heart, Remus cleared his throat, "You're the playboy… the playboy _never _falls in love expect in cliché chic flicks where he falls for the least likely person imaginable."

"Says who?!" Sirius sighed again, ignoring the fact that Remus seemed to know an awful lot about chic flicks, "But she's perfect Remus! Her hair and - and her body and - and - oh just everything about her!"

Remus was grumbling to himself, feeling more annoyed than he really ought to, "Look, that's all fine and dandy but you could've waited to the morning to tell me, at breakfast when I'm awake and ready for a heart attack. Now if you don't mind, dream-land is calling me."

Taking a step back and standing in the middle of the dorm with nothing but his boxers on, Sirius started laughing, feeling light hearted and _joyful._

"What the hell Sirius?" Half asleep, James attempted to throw a pillow at him.

"I'm in love Jamie-poo," Sirius replied, still grinning.

"That's nice dear…" James trailed off into very loud snores.

"Fancy that… Sirius Black in _love." _Sirius muttered to himself as he lay back down, well aware he wouldn't be able to sleep.

****

.x0x.

"Moony you look like death warmed up," James' eyebrows knitted together as Remus finally slumped down at the breakfast table.

"Thank the delightful Mr Black. He seemed to think waking me up at an ungodly hour to tell me he's in love was a good idea. But I've already got his murder worked out-"

"Something glamorous I hope?" Sirius interrupted as he too approached the table, "Ah! What glorious weather! What a day to be alive! What simply splendid food! What delightfully delicious toast! What -"

"Sirius, please to fucking god shut your trap before I pour the entire milk jug over your head," James hissed, "It is far too early to be cheerful and using words like _splendid."_

"The joy of love my dear, cannot be 'shut-up' as you so eloquently put it."

"Elo-whaty?" Peter wrinkled his nose as James sighed theatrically.

"God knows Pete, god knows."

****

.x0x.

"You shouldn't be here…" Remus mumbled half heartedly as Elizabeth began to play with his shirt.

"Why not? I was under the impression you enjoyed it yesterday?"

Remus couldn't argue with that.

****

.x0x.

"Should I tell her?"

"Tell her what Sirius?" Remus said, his tone as bored as he looked.

"That I love her, silly boy!"

"Yes Sirius."

"… but…then… what if she thinks I'm being too pushy?"

Remus groaned, very tempted to throw himself into the nearest fire. Sirius had started pacing again, asking Remus questions every few seconds and making their conversation go round in circles. And he was sick of listening to Sirius talk about _her._

Elizabeth walked past at that moment, signalling for Remus to follow her.

Hastily jumping out of his seat, he pushed Sirius onto the sofa and crouched down so they were face to face, "Look Sirius, I don't particularly care about you and Miss Elizabeth right now, so if you could go and bug James or somebody else I would extremely grateful as I currently have a sudden desire to go the library and escape from you."

Patting Sirius on the head, he left the room, not inclined to stick around.

****

.x0x.

"Still got no conscience?" Lily jumped of the table she had been perched on.

Remus jumped, his throat going dry, "N-no. And what's it to you?"

"He loves her Remus."

"He doesn't really Lily, he just thinks he does."

Lily laughed, brushing her hair out of her eyes, "You know that or just hope that?"

"Why would I hope that Sirius wasn't in love with…" He trailed off as he caught her meaningful look. "I do not."

"You do Remus, better to face the truth than keep lying to yourself."

****

.x0x.

"Moony… where on earth are you going?"

"Sirius! Didn't see you there, why are you there?" Remus stammered, his heart heaving. He had being sneaking out to meet her, that was until Sirius spotted him.

"Waiting for Elizabeth," Sirius sighed sadly, "I never seem to see her much, any idea where she is?"

__

Yes. Waiting in a broom cupboard on the third floor… waiting for you.

The voice remarked as Remus mentally slapped it.

"No idea Sirius. I'll tell her if I see her."

"Thanks… Hang on… Where are you going?"

But the portrait was already snapping shut.

****

.x0x.

"He's looking for you again," Remus whispered when she was pressed close against him.

She snorted, "Why should I care?"

****

.x0x.

"Where the hell have you been?"

Remus laughed slightly, not missing a beat, "Applying for the role of caring parent are you?"

Sirius glared at him, banging his fist on the desk in front of him, "Dammit Remus! What's with all the secrecy!"

Remus' glare turned cool, "Nothing that involves you and nothing you need to know about."

"You're right, I don't need to but I sure as hell would like to!" Sirius yelled angrily after him as Remus walked off.

Remus sighed as he fell onto his bed, shouldn't the guilt be pouring in by now?

Shouldn't it be suffocating him?

Killing him?

Driving him to insanity?

****

.x0x.

He walked behind them, his eyes fixed like daggers on their clasped hands.

She was laughing at something he said, whilst he was smiling back.

Trying not to vomit, Remus turned to Peter, "I'm betting another two weeks, you?"

Peter rose his eyebrows and didn't reply.

They settled down by the lake where Sirius proceeded to feed _her _chocolate mixed with frequent kisses. Remus' eyes set moodily on the dark water, trying to ignore the emotions mixing inside him.

Guilt was not one of them.

He had the sudden urge to push her away, to take her place, to be the one Sirius loved…

Standing up abruptly, eyes wide and frightened he turned and fled.

…What the hell?

****

.x0x.

"Have you noticed something odd about Remus lately?" Sirius asked conversationally when he was sat with Lily and James a couple of weeks later.

Lily smirked to herself whilst James shook his head, "Not really."

"Oh… well I'm not sure really… I think I'm being paranoid, but is he avoiding me?" Looking extremely worried, Sirius was practically sat on the edge of his seat.

"Where is he anyway?" James cast his eye about as though only just realising the werewolf wasn't there.

"That's another thing. Since when is Remus ever secretive with us anymore?" Sirius frowned, "He keeps going off and not saying where. I _know _it's not to the library; I have a little spy over there."

"Awww… wikkle pads has a cwush!" James exclaimed with a gooey smile.

"Go to hell Potter, I'm merely concerned with my friend's well being!" Sirius glowered at them as he stood up, "Well I'm going to find him even if I have to search every nook and cranny of this castle!"

Lily waited till he'd gone before saying, "He does realise how big this castle is _and _that most of it is pitch black at this time of night?"

"It's Sirius love, don't expect him to think logically. He has Sirius logic and that's about it."

"Sirius logic which always seems to be right somehow," Peter spoke up from where he'd been sat in his own world for the past half-hour.

"True, strangely enough."

****

.x0x.

"He's starting to ask questions," Remus told her as he meticulously folded up his shirt, "He's starting to get awkward."

__

And yet the guilt still doesn't come…

"So? He wouldn't ever think you capable of doing this…"

Remus smirked, "People do have a habit of underestimating me…"

****

.x0x.

"Stupid Remus and his stupid disappearances… stupid Remus for making me stupid care… stupid Remus for being stupid…" Sirius was skulking around the library, trying to find any signs of life.

So far, all he'd found was three mice, four spiders, eight flies and a _pig _for some reason.

Giving up, he went to leave, freezing when the door creaked as he tried to ease it open. "What the hell…" he muttered before throwing caution to the wind, flinging it back and sprinting off down the corridor.

"STUDENT NEAR THE LIBRARY! STUDENT OUT OF BED! STUDENT ESCAPING!" Peeves yelled from somewhere behind him and Sirius grabbed the nearest door in a panic, squeezing himself inside and hurriedly apologising to its occupants.

With his ear pressed against the door, he waited with bated breath for the footsteps to pass.

****

.x0x.

Remus had being in the middle of stripping her when somebody had crammed themselves into the little remaining space with a hurried apology.

Tutting, he pressed himself up against the back wall with Elizabeth flush against his chest.

He was too annoyed to realise that the scent was overly familiar to him…

****

.x0x.

He was still listening for footsteps when he got a sudden idea, "Hey… sorry to interrupt and everything but have either of you seen Remus Lupin? Quite small with brown eyes and sandy hair? Gryffindor?"

"…Sirius?" _Shit._

"Is that you Moony?" Sirius sounded oddly delighted.

"Er - yes it is Sirius, now do you think you could maybe leave?" Remus all but pleaded.

"Who's your companion?" Sirius asked, completely disregarding Remus' question, "Let me get a look at her -" He started to pull out his wand.

"NO!"

"… why not?"

"Because… Because… er- well, I'm totally starker's…" Remus tried desperately.

Elizabeth giggled.

Sirius chuckled too, "I've seen you naked before my dear, you seem to be forgetting we share a dorm."

"Sirius just please go!"

"Ahh I get it now." Remus stiffened. "There is no girl and you're currently doing it with a bucket or something and you're embarrassed."

Elizabeth giggled again, louder this time.

Remus rolled his eyes, relief flooding through him, "Yes Sirius, yes precisely. Now will you leave."

"Not until I get to see your sweetheart…_Lumos!"_

"No -"

"There, that's better! Aw Remus, come on! Move! I can only see your back and your naked little jacksie," he added with a chuckle and a squeeze of said 'jacksie'.

"Sirius please go and do stop molesting me." Remus commanded, his voice muffled by her hair.

"Hmmm… let me think, which girls do I know have slightly curly brown hair?"

"For fuck sake Sirius! Will you just go!"

"Temper, temper and no I won't. Tell me who she is."

Remus sighed, squeezing his eyes shut. Somebody up there must hate him. "Believe me Padfoot, you don't want to know."

Silence fell on the three as Sirius mentally ran through all the brown haired girls he knew.

"Aw fuck this, I've got loads of things I could be doing!" Elizabeth sighed as she pushed Remus away from her and picked up her discarded jumper.

Sirius' jaw dropped, "_Elizabeth?!" _

She rolled her eyes, slung her tie around her neck and pushed her way out of the cupboard, "Good day."

Sirius said nothing, his mind blank, his eyes expressionless.

Instead he turned and very calmly walked away.

Remus sighed heavily, well aware that the friendship he so treasured was over.

****

.x0x.

"Sirius… Sirius look at me."

Sirius didn't move, didn't care.

"I'll say sorry if it'll make you feel better."

"But you won't mean it?"

Silence met his words.

"I- I can't say I do Padfoot…"

"Don't call me that."

They both sat there; Sirius still numb and Remus waiting for the inevitable explosion.

"Why?"

Remus didn't speak. He knew why; that cursed jealousy. It was what he was jealous _of _he didn't know. "I'm not quite certain on that."

Sirius' eyes were empty, solid and ice cold.

Remus was still waiting for the guilt to start pouring in, for the sudden urge to beg to flare inside him but all he felt was insane happiness at breaking them up.

"Was that the first time or has it happened before?"

Remus contemplated him more closely; the vulnerable expression that made Remus want him all the more, the well toned body that made Remus crave him, the floppy hair that Remus longed to run his fingers through, the emptiness in his eyes that made Remus _care._

And Remus found he hated him for it.

His lips curled into a cruel smile as he whispered in Sirius' ear, "No… I've fucked every single one of your little girlfriends and they enjoyed every single second of it."

Sirius punched him.

And Remus relished in it. He should be feeling guilty, he should be hating himself, he should be crying out for forgiveness and certainly _not_ thinking of all the ways he could snog Sirius…

His breathing laboured, Sirius stood up. He glared at Remus, Remus with big eyes and blood pouring from his nose, "You're meant to be my friend and yet you're not even sorry."

Remus said nothing, he couldn't deny it, he couldn't say he was sorry because that, that would be lying.

And Remus had done enough lying to last him a life time.

Sirius stayed standing, his shirt mostly unbuttoned, his hair slightly messy, his lips parted.

Remus looked away, gulping hard.

He should be feeling guilty…

But now he understood…

"What do you want? Me to lie? Me to beg for forgiveness? For our friendship? Do you want me to bug you until you forgive me? Do you want me to cry? Plead? Scream? Shout? What?" Remus stood up too, his heart was hammering and his fists clenched.

He wanted Sirius to punch him.

He wanted to be punished for not feeling guilty…

He wanted to be punished for not feeling anything…

"No. I just want you to at least care."

They were stood nose to nose, emotions running high, sleep well forgotten.

And Remus laughed.

"I want to care Sirius, I _want _to feel that shame… but I can't, I just can't."

Sirius took an unsteady step back, snorting, "You don't even care about our friendship do you?"

Remus hesitated; did he? _No… you've cheated him in the worst way possible and you can't even be sorry. _That stupid voice was back. "I care," he finally said, his voice barely audible, "I care enough to still be here."

"Well I'm glad about that, if you could maybe act-"

"And what about you huh? Shouldn't you maybe care more than you seem too?" Remus snarled back, prodding him in the chest.

Sirius ignored him, his eyes miles away as he slowly said, "I've just found out my best friend has shagged the girl I think I'm in love with and … and yeah, maybe I _should_ care more than I do."

Remus turned away, where was that burning fear of loosing Sirius, where was that pain he was meant to feel…

The clock chimed three but both boys stayed standing where they were, too caught up in their own confusion.

Sirius was the first to move, sinking onto a sofa and resting his head in his hands, "You've been sleeping with her… Shouldn't I be breaking things, shouting and screaming, too angry to think rationally?"

"Are you?"

Sirius shook his head, "No… no I don't think I am."

"And why not?"

"The same reason as you," Sirius said, lifting his head to look Remus in the eye, "Because she means nothing to me."

"But I should still feel guilt… I should still feel fear… anger… pain… I feel none of it. Maybe, maybe I am just a monster…"

Sirius grabbed his hand tightly, "You're as much of a monster as me then. I feel more proud of you than anything else and I should be hating your guts right about now."

"Aren't we fucked up…"

They both laughed but the sound was strained even to their own ears.

"Remus… just tell me why, that's all I want to know."

Remus gulped, not wanting to lie but not wanting to tell the truth either. "It's ridiculous really," he murmured eventually.

Sirius rose an eyebrow, "Just tell me, surely I have a right to know?"

"…I was jealous," Remus couldn't look at him, didn't dare.

"Of what?"

"I don't know… I don't know. I guess I thought that sleeping with them would make it go away, that I was jealous of you…" Remus spoke slowly, his voice halting at every word as the sensible Remus urged him on.

"And did it work?"

The silence had returned, the thick heavy silence that buzzed in their ears.

Remus laughed humourlessly, "I wish."

The tick of the clock filled the pause, monotonous and loud. A reminder that time was passing by.

"So you were jealous of them?" Sirius supplied for him, barely allowing himself chance to realise what he was saying.

Remus blushed slightly, his eyes trained on the carpet, "Unfortunately."

"I see," Sirius paused again, trying to gather his thoughts, "And why didn't you just tell me instead of resorting to extreme measures?"

"Because Sirius Black has all the girls."

****

.x0x.

Lily was watching them from the top of the stairs, the handy spell James had taught her letting her catch everything they said.

She never could understand boys, especially when they were both ignoring the stereotypical.

****

.x0x.

Sirius laughed shortly, "And some of the boys."

"… pardon?"

"I don't just have all the girls Remus, I've had some of the boys too," the old Sirius was back, the bright eyed, grinning Sirius.

The one Remus Lupin had fallen in love with.

Remus didn't know what to say, didn't how to react so instead he laughed. "That I can believe."

Sirius knew, Sirius knew Remus liked him. Shouldn't they currently be entwined on the sofa or something?

"I just hope Elizabeth will stay with me…"

Wait… what!?

Remus said nothing, the panic visible on his face needed no words.

Sirius laughed and took his hand, squeezing it tightly, "We'll need a cover story; I doubt the students of Hogwarts will take to well to the idea of us."

Remus felt the relief flutter through him and finally allowed himself to smile properly. "I stand by my earlier statement that we are fucked up, well and truly." Maybe things were going in his favour after all.

"Oh definitely, but then again, I _am _Sirius Black my dear."

* * *

I do enjoy making Remus cheat on his best friends for some reason... No idea why. Orginally I was going to use this as the reason for 'TheSnapeIncident' and turn it into a one-shot about that, but, obviously, I changed my mind.

Would just like to say that they do get together, just in a very obscure way.

I seem to like writing _very _long oneshots at the moment and have a couple more I might upload at some point.

The title is a song...Does anyone know who sings it?

Review xD

(p.s had some problems with formatting so there's a couple of gaps where there shouldn't be)


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